Send in the clowns!

Just a quick post to let everyone know Darling Daughter and I will be marching in clown in the Drake Relays parade this Sunday (April 20). The parade starts at 2 p.m. - not sure where it officially starts yet (guess I should figure that out) but it does one lap around campus.

Daughter is really excited! This will be her first time clowning with me. She's going to do the "invisible dog on a leash" gag.

I'll be the clown in the pink hat!

What did you do today?

Today I explained the entire democratic process to my five year old Darling Daughter using hand puppets.

It was quite good if I do say so myself. It didn't start out as a puppet show but one question from Daughter led to another until it just kind of went that way.

Here's a snippet of our conversation:

DARLING DAUGHTER: What's a campaign?

DMG: It's what people do when they want to be president. They talk and talk and "blah blah blah, my ideas are best blah blah blah, vote for me, blah blah blah...."

DARLING DAUGHTER: And it's very boring...

DMG: It can be. But then they have a debate!

DARLING DAUGHTER: What's that?

DMG: That's when the people who want to be president talk to each other and fight! "Blah blah blah my ideas are best! No mine are! You shut up! You're a poopy head! Blah blah blah blah blah!!!!" It can be very exciting!

DARLING DAUGHTER: (delightful laughter) Do it again!!!

Things got sillier from that point on but in hindsight I don't think I was too far off the mark.

Five more days until the Iowa Caucus.

Picture: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:PereDuchesneIllustre6_1_0.png

Thanks for nothin'

A couple weeks ago, Darling Daughter brought home a Thanksgiving hat she made at school. It is very cute! It looks like a turkey with three large feathers for a tail in the back. But it wasn't until tonight that I took a reeeally good look at it.

On each of the feathers she had written something she is thankful for:

1. The first feather said, "Jesus" (very nice! made me proud!)

2. The second feather said, "Daddy" (again, heartwarming!)

3. The third feather said, "My T.V." (....uh-huh...)

Does anyone else notice something here? What happened to Mommy? Jesus I can understand but do I really rank lower than the T.V.? :-P

I'm going to remind her of this moment when she decides she wants ice sculptures at her wedding. "Well, darling, maybe the T.V. will buy them for you!" ;-)

The voice in my head

Darling Daughter was home sick today from school. Nothing serious - post nasal drip from allergies made her gag and sick to her stomach this morning. Probably still should have sent her to school.

She felt fine all day and talked...non....stop....!!!!!! If she wasn't talking to me, she talked to herself. If I ask her to go play by herself, she would tell me everything she was doing step-by-step. How she didn't pass out from lack of oxygen is miraculous.

Baby Boy was low maintenance except for peeing on the wall....

Brave new world

I want to remember every detail…

Darling Daughter hopped out of bed this morning without any prodding from Mommy and Daddy. She came in to our bedroom to say good morning and for hugs and kisses while I was still feeding Baby Boy.

She put on her new red dress and Daddy helped her with the buttons and tied her belt. She then put on white socks and her “Hello Kitty” black shoes with pink flowers.

At first she was worried she would mess up her dress if she ate breakfast but then accepted my suggestion of a cereal bar – strawberry with white squiggle icing. We then had her stand with her pink and purple Disney Princess backpack in front of the fireplace for some pictures. It was too hot and muggy to take pictures outside.

She was so anxious – she couldn’t wait to leave. A few more hugs, a few more kisses. “Mommy is really proud of you!” and then she was gone – off to her first day of kindergarten.

I feel so old…

Educational moment

Having Darling Daughter home with me while I've been on maternity leave has been very...educational....for her and for me.

I give you Exhibit A. While watching me nurse baby boy, Darling Daughter remarked...

DARLING DAUGHTER: Mommy, your boobies look like buttons but they aren't buttons cuz they're boobies.

Ummm....oooookay....

I now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Picture: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Clothes_button.jpg

Pulling my hair out

We went out to dinner Thursday night with mother-in-law for darling daughter's birthday. I really hate going out to dinner with MIL because darling daughter ALWAYS misbehaves. Last night was a typical dinner out with MIL.

PDA not okay
Darling daughter always acts up and doesn't listen to what we say because she knows Grandma will "rescue" her. One of us will try to discipline daughter and get her to sit still, behave, eat her food or stop whatever behavior is unacceptable and then suddenly it's the cuddly-cooing-snuggle-fest-lovey-dove show. Daughter snuggles up to MIL and MIL puts her arm around her and they snuggle and coo and kiss, rub noses...etc...all the time ignoring us - it is really nauseating. It's like sitting across the table from two teenagers making out.

Darling Daughter is old enough now she should understand what is appropriate restaurant behavior. The PDA has got to stop. Of course, Hubby has mentioned this to his mom before and the behavior hasn't changed. :-/ And let me make this clear - I'm not talking about a quick cuddle or a quick peck on the cheek before the food comes, it is close 75% of the time we are sitting in the restaurant.

If we force the issue and break up their love-in, then we are the bad guys. MIL rarely verbally challenges us directly but by allowing daughter to hang on her and cuddle and coo while we are trying to get her to behave accomplishes the same thing. She is essentially saying, "Don't listen to them. You're not in trouble. Grandma will protect you."

Sometimes MIL will say something to us like, "She's just a little girl..." or she's said to Hubby numerous times "Why are you so grumpy?" and "What's YOUR problem?" Our problem is MIL!!! When we are disciplining darling daughter she needs to separate herself! She needs to stop allowing daughter to hang on her and cuddle and coo with her.

Occasionally, she'll repeat to daughter what we've been trying to get her to do but it is always half hearted and timid - no conviction. If she would back us up and say with a more authoritative tone, "Listen to your daddy/mommy!" then maybe I'd feel like we were on the same side. Right now I feel like it's me and Hubby against darling daughter and MIL.

MIL will also feed daughter like she's a baby - picking up sandwiches for her to take a bite, spoon feeding her and such. Hubby said something the other day so maybe this will stop. In the past she’s allowed daughter to eat off her plate instead of insisting darling daughter eat her own food – that is until I put my foot down. For crying out loud the child is five years old and MIL still treats her like she's two!!!

More drama
The bad behavior continued when we got home. By the end of it I was wiped out. Then it was bed time and darling daughter announces, "I want to sleep with Grandma!" (MIL was staying overnight). I said she could sleep in her own bed or sleep in her tent in the living room but she was not going to sleep with Grandma cuz the bed wasn't big enough. I admit - I really just didn't want them sleeping in the same bed. It's not that I think some kind of creepy Michael Jackson thing is going on, but I think MIL needs to cut the apron strings a little.

Well - instead of saying, "Your mommy said no. We can play in the morning," or anything supportive MIL says to me, "I don't mind." Darling daughter hung on to that single statement for the next hour screaming, "I WANNA SLEEP WITH GRANDMA!!!! SHE SAID SHE DOESN'T MIND!!!!" Thanks Grandma. Really appreciate it.

Then Hubby said, "I don't mind if they sleep in the same bed." I told him, "I've already made the statement." To his credit, Hubby didn't fight me on it but then he had to fight with darling daughter to get her ready for bed. The parents finally won the battle but once again we have extra DRAMA because MIL wouldn't back us up.

Hot under the collar...literally
To top it off, it was really hot in the house Thursday night. Thermostat batteries were running low so the air conditioning wasn't keeping up. Hubby replaced the batteries but it still took most of the night for the house to cool off. I was so uncomfortable I gave up and tried to sleep on the couch in the living room (cooler on lower levels) but still had an awful time. At one point I was sleeping on the floor thinking that would help. Finally, at 3am it was cool enough I went back upstairs. Hooray! A whole 2 and 1/2 hours in my bed before the alarm goes off.

Friday morning I couldn't get out the door fast enough. Darling daughter was home with MIL all day and I just couldn't stand being in the house any longer than necessary.

MIL stayed over again Friday night (not my idea) but thankfully we had a drama free evening. Better news – darling daughter’s birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese this morning went very well – no drama or upsets. All the kids had a great time!!!

But the best news of all is MIL went home shortly after the party and I have my house back and I can enjoy the rest of my weekend.

I know I'm hormonal and I know I'm tired and I know I have a lot of emotional baggage when it comes to my mother-in-law but I really don't think it's too much to ask that MIL knock off the cuddle fest when we are trying to discipline darling daughter.

Picture: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Scream

Time warp

My "baby" turns 5 years old today. She'll start kindergarten this fall. Where has the time gone?

Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flow the days
Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers
Blossoming even as we gaze

Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly fly the years
One season following another
Laden with happiness and tears

-Sunrise Sunset, Fiddler on the Roof

Long story short - funny ending

I inherited a suitcase full of magic tricks from a clown who is retiring. I found a can of "Fancy Salted Nuts" inside. Knowing exactly what it was, I handed it to darling daughter and asked if she could open it. She could tell by our giggles and big smiles there was something funny about the can (smart girl). So she started laughing and couldn't open it. I had to help her. The snake that jumped out was pretty funny!

Should I ask my mother-in-law to open the can next time she comes over? *wicked laughter!* :-)

Picture: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:SnakeNutCan.JPG