Mother's Day - Part II

I'm happy to say I got rid of my blues. Mother’s Day was chaotic, crazy, funny, stressful, and tiring….in other words, it was just like any other day. The day started with cards and a gift – a card from hubby and a card from darling daughter. I like my gift - a croquet set with its own travel bag – sounds silly but it was something I had been wanting for awhile.

On to church…no Sunday School or children’s church so little girl had to sit with us through the service. When Pastor said good morning to the congregation, little girl shouted, “Good morning!” The whole congregation laughed and all I could do was laugh right along with them. I could have done without her squirming, hiccupping, and asking, “Are we DONE yet?” every five minutes but we survived. Her audible fart at one point during the sermon was a very special Mother’s Day moment.

On to mother-in-law’s for lunch…Despite all my worry and petty whining last night, lunch was fine. No dramatics, no power plays or guilt trips. Mother-in-law gave me a little coffee table book, Thank Heaven for Little Girls. It’s filled with poems and pictures of well behaved children in Victorian dress playing with their dolls and having tea – about as far from my reality as the East is from the West but it’s a cute little book all the same.

It’s sad I’ve come to expect the worst when we have these family things – special days or holidays. I always get so tense. I admit – I have issues with my mother-in-law. There was a time, early on, when I would have welcomed a closer relationship with her, but too often we’ve been on opposite sides; her tugging hubby one way and me tugging the other.

She sees him as her son and under her rule alone. She is fond of quoting scripture, “Children obey your parents.” She always skips the second part, “Parents do not frustrate your children.” She knows he has obligations to fill as a husband and a father but forgets when those obligations are at odds with what she wants.

We never openly fight and we do have some very nice visits like today. We interact like a dog and a cat living in the same house – tolerant and occasionally friendly but never overly affectionate or warm towards the other. Do I have the power to change our relationship? Perhaps - but maybe it would just be too hard now.

I really didn’t start this post with the intention of turning it into a “confessions of a weary daughter-in-law.” Just thinking and typing I guess…